Madrid 18/08/2001- Pat Metheny (Special Reporter). If you would explain to any intelligent person that a French is the first Official Spanish neppies Championship classified, the laughs would be heard in Laponia, but that is the sadness reality. After the previous rehersal, the first championship race has cleared a little bit things and has given up an incredibke surprise wich makes tumble down the spanish competitive in any matter wich requires some concentration. The jjourney started with a lot of casualties, "The Compact Pussy" (Manu); Rocío; Laura; "De Pelotilla" (Toni) y "Cotxu" (Oscar) didn´t take the start in the first sesion where the only drivers were: "Metalman" (Abraham); "The Punisher" (David); "Rastaffari Taxi" (David/franchute); "Zapatilla" (Borja) and "The Beer Hunter" (Isra) with Elena as the excepcional beauty spectator (Photos Soon). The Circuit (we only make one because the dry sand of the spanish ground) had the classical Triple Tuhero ans Tuhero over curve, Three Jumps with pit, being two of them consecutives, and two new variants, the first is two "Stoned area", wich means that we fill the path with rocks wich obstacle the circulation and lurks all the time with the...kelli and second, a zone in the begining wich separates the road in two where u could choose among the security of the long road or take some risks in the Tuhero path wit a short trip, of course "The Punisher", "the Beer Hunter" and "Rastaffari Taxi" knew that life without risk doesn´t mean anything, while "Zapatilla" and "Metalman" decided that the most important thing is to get through. 1st Race: It resulted divided in three parts very diferenced from the begining and it was caused basically by the first jump. On the one hand "Rastaffari Taxi" and "Metalman" with some incredible first jumps while at 6 nepps behind was "The beer hunter", staying far away "Zapatilla" and "The Punisher" both left behind from the first positions, "The Punisher" was very nervous all the race with a lot of fails improper for such an skilled driver, perhaps the points presure defeat him. The rest of the circuit settled a premise "Don´t fail wher u don´t have to fail", it´s not necesary to be very fast, but don´t make stupid errors and take only controled risks, this coward, mean and despicable was developed by the person who came from Napoleon´s country (Napoleon was gay, we all know), he didn´t make such a kelli, passed through almost all the obstacles at the first try and get the first position with 3 nepps average from "Metalman", full of brilliant nepps but with absurds failures origined by his unforeseeable nature, or by the beer, who knows. The third Position was for "The beer Hunter", sober...well, drunk but full of adrenaline after have jumped out from an 80 meters bridge while "The Punisher" get into the fourth position swearing and blaming on the bad luck....mmphh...,and last"Zapatllla" blame on the Franchute (Rastaff...) cause he won him in the morning playing tennis and he was going to win him again. 2nd Race: The second race was a simple stroll for "The Beer Hunter" who from the startin nepps take the head and nobody could stop him getting the goalwith 7 nepps average over the second driver, an almost perfect driving (It´s my crhonicle and i say what I want). But was in this racce where the neppies took his most pure esence, the second position was not decide until the last two curves, "Rastaffari Taxi" aheaded but "The Punisher", proving who is him, recovered positions until he could figth for the 2nd place. In the straigth previous the final curves wich was an "Stoned Area", The Franchute decided to go on with his cowardy tactic, short nepps to avoid kelli, in that point "Teh Punisher" with two magister jump get into a nepp from "Rastaffari Taxi", well it would be one nepp if it wasn´t been the "stoned Area". "The punisher" risked and nepp with a high class, but "The Bergerot Effect" felt under him and the kelli sunk his hopes. 2nd position for the Franchute who made secure the First position in the championship and third position for David who thougth that this would be the moment to compensate the first race but was not his day... altougth he was the pretiest car. All Behind all was already clear, "Zapatilla" were gonna be fourth and "Metalman", victim of his own genialities fell down until the last place but he gave us an antologic nepp, a nepp wich only can appear from the "Metalman" fingers; from 2 nepps to a jump distance, he nepped, get through the path, jump in that way that felt making a curve wich left him clear to face the straigth, impresionant. The final scores shows that something is happening in France, World and European footbal championship, leading the Spanish neppies Tournament, Perhaps the Astérix Legend it´s true...Qui lo sá?. B neppied.